Friday, December 31, 2010

Friday, December 24, 2010

Monday, December 20, 2010

Do you know how there are moments when the world moves so slowly you can feel your bones shifting, your mind tumbling? When you heart is pumping to an irregular beat that you’re not used too?

Matters of the human heart are inexplicable and can be controlled by a defibrillator, unkind words, a massaging hand, or even just a look. Sonnets and entire books have been devoted to the meaning of love, how the human heart works, and how something much bigger than us made such a thing. The blood pump in your chest is a small machine that weighs less than a pound, and beats roughly 35 million times a year. You can't live or love without it.  There are veins and arteries going in and out of this machine that keep you alive every single second. During the course of your life, the heart never gives up, never quits. Once it starts in the womb, it has the liver, gall bladder, pancreas, small intestines, stomach, colon, large intestines, lungs, spleen, and brain depending on its every beat. Every pump of blood that has been oxygenated has the lungs gasping, every bone waiting for the supply to come around once more, every single brain cell waiting for the blood to reassure its pure being. The heart never offers to relinquish. The four most important parts of a heart contains two atriums, two ventricles, but something that a health science book won’t tell you is that there is a fifth part, a hole, specifically a key hole. This key hole has one key and one key only specified for a certain person, a person that never gives up, a person that loves, and a person that chooses to never surrender.
It’s easier to think screw life, screw work, screw everything, than to admit that you’re overwhelmed and feel like you’re drowning. because sometimes, it’s easier to admit the simple things than to say the hard things and realize how much you’ve been struggling and how much you feel as if life has gone out of your control.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

A Hidden Blessing

For by you I can run against a troop, and by my God I can leap over a wall.
This God—his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him. For who is God, but the Lord?
And who is a rock, except our God?— the God who equipped me with strength
and made my way blameless. He made my feet like the feet of a deer
and set me secure on the heights.

Psalm 18:29-33

Nothing has the ability to strip away human pretense and false humility like adversity. It has a way of revealing who we really are, what we are made of, and how we view life. Not only that, but adversity also reveals our view of God and out ability to trust Him in difficult situations. It brings to the surface hidden emotions such as fear, low self-esteem, and jealousy. It is likewise efficient in illuminating out strengths. If the adversity comes as the result of a personal attack or betrayal, it shows whether we are willing to forgive those who have betrayed us.
Most important, adversity is a gauge of our level of faith. If we trust God in the small trials, then when the winds of adversity howl, we are much more likely to stand in faith rather than retreat in weakness. This principle was magnified in the life of the apostle Paul. Several times, he mentioned the hardships he endured. Recalling past trials gave Paul an opportunity to honor God for His faithfulness.

Within every problem or sorrow is a hidden blessing as well as an opportunity for a lesson of faith. Paul's "thorn in the flesh" kept him humble and focused on the sufficiency of Christ. If adversity has besieged your life, ask God to show you the blessing He has for you and the lesson He wants to learn. 

I know I have. Will you?

The Lord God is my strength; He will make my feet like deer's feet, and He will make me walk on my high hills. 

Habakkuk 3:19

Monday, November 22, 2010

God is in your boat.

I, even I am He who comforts you.
Who are you that you should be afraid of a man who will die, and 

of the son of a man who will be make like grass?
-Isaiah 51:12

There is no escaping it. Trouble comes at some point to everyone, but there also is a victory in suffering that cannot be overlooked. Joni Eareckson Tada explains, "I believe those who suffer the greatest on earth have the greatest confidence of sharing in His highest glory. This is a wonderful inspiration to those who are hurting. Amy Carmmichael wrote something I will never forget: "We will have all of eternity to celebrate victories, but only few hours before sunset in which to win them."

Some of our greatest triumphs come as a result of being willing to weather the storms of life. When we commit ourselves to trusting Jesus regardless of the outcome, God's power is released in might ways. The disciples did not forget what it was like to face the gale-force winds of the Sea of Galilee. Neither did they forget the power of the hush that came as a result of Christ's command to the wind and the sea.

The faith they gained in troubled times could not be imitated or duplicated. It became a part of their personal testimony to a great and wondrous God. Jesus saves those who trust in Him.

Are you facing something much greater than your ability to handle? Turn your fear and sorrow over to Jesus. Allow Him to take your hurt and disappointment. When He is in your boat, there is no need to worry.

I've been going through a "listless" period in my life.
This is what God showed me through His word.
I pray that you turn every fear that you have over to Him.

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ,  through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we boast in the hope of the glory of God. 

Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. 

And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. 

Romans 5:1-5

Saturday, November 20, 2010

I need someone or something to tell me how I feel, but if I start looking for the words it won't ever be right. A song would maybe explain something, but it can never be to the point. Only good classic music gets me, understands me. Good classic music isn't around anymore. I don't know where I'm going with this. I feel as though I'm in Limbo. I don't believe it Limbo. My head has too much energy. I can't relax. What's wrong with me?

A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the dang poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the heck out of never trying.

When it comes down to it, I feel like I'm slacking in school, when really I'm not. I should pray more. I focus on work too much, and leave school out because I enjoy work more than school. I'm happy, but not. Its a weird feeling. I would say that I feel like something is missing, but its not. I feel content. Just uneasy. But those two words are antonyms. I sometimes think I'm misconstrued.

You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true.

BUT: At the end of the day faith is a funny thing. It turns up when you don't really expect it. Its like one day you realize that the fairy tale may be slightly different than you dreamed. The castle, well, it may not be a castle. And its not so important happy ever after, just that its happy right now. See once in a while, once in a blue moon, people will surprise you , and once in a while people may even take your breath away.

I need some people to take my breath away.
My head is full; of thinking.
I need to not think for awhile. Just for five minutes.

I sleep fine, I carry on with life fine, I'm happy.
But thinking, destroys me.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Those minutes where I am alone, just me and my pillow. I think, a lot. I think about everything, anything. It varies from "what am I doing with my life?" to "did I have homework?" The room is so silent, but my mind is so loud. It drives me crazy because the things I would never think about, I think about. Sometimes, I hate it because it brings up thing I would rather never think about again. The split second before sleep is the most active second of my life.

It seems as though when I wake up, I feel rested. However my dreams come true. Some way, somehow. That active second before I fall asleep makes me feel like I can do anything in my dreams.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

And if after reading this, you still don't believe that you have a person that totally loves and admires you, you're wrong. You're just wrong. Because no matter what your thinking, and no matter what you think of yourself, I think your amazing, and I think your beautiful, because everyone and everything has beauty, and you just happen to be apart of that everyone.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

This is the view I'm encountering for the next few days.

&& I've decided, that no matter what happens, it's not the end of the world. I will go on with life. No matter what.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

November 2 = Bad day, good ending.

there's something so beautiful about a woman who can pickup what's left of herself, and move on with her life. because she realizes that time stops for no one;
and as long as we keep moving, everything is going to heal at some point
we keep moving, everything is going to heal at some point.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

A few things I needed to say:

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad it seems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I've learned that you can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things: a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life. I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on both hands; you need to be able to throw some things back. I've learned that whenever I decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. I've learned that every day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, or just a friendly pat on the back. I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

Mariah: It was like she was only there when it was convenient for him; like she was the gas station no one ever visited unless their tank was coming up on empty. Yeah, there were days when she hated him & there were days when she was head over heals too. But none of those days mattered, because she could never have him no matter how hard she fell. One day, she'll realize that someone is out there that beats all the ones in the past, present and future.

Melinda: This is life. People will screw you over. You’ll fight with your family, loved ones, and exs. You’ll witness things that will change you forever. You’ll blame new lovers for things old lovers did. Some come and some go. You’ll come to realize that everyone has a past. You’ll cry, you’ll laugh, & you’ll embarrass yourself. But then, you’ll find your very own moment where none of that matters; where you can sit back & realize that stuff happens to the people who can handle it & that this is who you are, & that no one should want to change you, including yourself.

Anonymous: I know a lot of people know who he is, but I also know there are not that many who got to see the side of the guy that I did. And that guy, well, I'll never forget him. Not ever. I've learned so much about life and emotion from knowing him and I wouldn't change a thing about it, including the ending. Your heart needs to go through some bumps like these once in a while. Besides, he has made a monumental impact on me and on my life in these past few years. I would never go back to that again.

Lee: You broke her down, you broke her heart and you call her up like its nothing. Well screw you, and that's me putting it politely, how about you go jump off a cliff?

Ashton: Take every chance you get. Because honestly no matter where you end up, or who you end up with, it always ends up the way it should be. Your mistakes are what makes you the person you are today. You learn & grow with each choice. Make everything you do worth it. Live your life as if there won't be any tomorrow. Say how you feel, always be you, & be okay with it.

Paige: What defines a best friend? What are the requirements to be a good best friend? How many hours a week does it entail? Stupid questions that have no answers. A best friend is not defined by how many times they talk on the phone, or how many hours they hang out together. It is not defined by how many sleepovers they gossip at, or how many inside jokes they have. There are no requirements or laws that state a good best friend must hang out with them every weekend, or tell each other every little detail. A best friend is a matter of opinion. It is the person who has been there for you through everything, not just through the fun things, or the little things. It is the person that you call when you are at your absolute worst, it is the person who saves you when you didn’t even notice that you needed saving, mostly it is the person who accepts you for who you are, and the person that you are becoming.

Sarah: Please don't ever forget where you came from. I love you.

John: When I take you to the beach for the first time, this is how I imagine it. I want warm summer nights, to lie in a hammock, staring at the stars, telling you stories. I want to dip my toes in the water, to dangle my feet off the edge of the dock and sit leaning forward, looking at you, laughing. To huddle around a fire on the beach, salt water drying into my hair, reading from that book you always carry. I want to sit next to you on a log and sleep next to you in a tent. I want to wake up early and make pancakes over a fire, to wash the dishes in the river while we swim. To build sandcastles and castles-in-the-air. I want to drive home with my bare feet on the dashboard, the windows down, my hair whipped in every direction from the wind rushing through the open windows. I want to hear your voice humming to the tune of the songs on the radio that you don’t know the words to. I want to be able to look at you and smile and not say a word. To have adventures and passion and to truly live with you by my side.

James: You can't always sit in your corner of the forest and wait for people to come to you. You have to go to them sometimes. [Winnie the Pooh]

Ben: I'm really glad that you are happy. Its good to see a smiley face when I ask you how you are on facebook.

Summer's gone, and I am waiting for new beginnings with better endings. Long nights for the sleep deprived. I'll write these letters to you from a desk in my room that's bleeding truth.

[here we are together
i never would have guessed it
baby there's a reason
and baby there's a message
cause we've all seen the glories
and we've all heard love stories
stranger than this
punch lines and ironies
swirl through the galaxies
like dust in the sunbeams
that slant through our windows
and heartbeats and molecules
geniuses and silly fools
we're all at the mercies
of punch lines and ironies
echoes and rumors
of Gods sense of humor 
leak out of heaven
in the mysteries and legends
and they whisper their glories
into our love stories
and help us believe
yeah help us believe
punch lines and ironies
swirl through the galaxies
like dust in the sunbeams
that slant through our windows
and heartbeats and molecules
geniuses and silly fools
we're all at the mercies
of punch lines and ironies]

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

love love love this song.

I awoke, only to find my lungs empty
Through the night, so it seems I'm not breathing
And now my dreams are nothing like they were meant to be
And I'm Breaking Down
I think I'm breaking down

And I'm afraid to sleep because of what haunts me
Such as living with the uncertainties
That I'll never find the words to say
Which would completely explain
Just how I'm breaking down

Someone come, Someone come and save my life
Maybe I'll sleep when I am dead
But now its like the night is taking up sides
With all the worries that occupy the back of my mind
Could it be? This misery will suffice

(Gordon Downey Singing This Verse)
I've become, the simple souvenir of someone's KILL
Like the sea, I'm constantly changing from calm to ill
Madness fills my heart and soul
As if the great divide could swallow me whole
Oh, how I'm breaking down

Someone come, Someone come and save my life
Maybe I'll sleep when I am dead
But now its like the night is taking up sides
With all the worries that occupy the back of my mind
Could it be? This misery will suffice

Someone come, Someone come and save my life

Someone come, Someone come and save my life

Someone come, Someone come and save my life
Could it be? This misery will suffice

So, this is for Paige Emmitt.

First of all, I love you and you love me, so you don't like me to be stressed, soooo... I'm going to make a checklist that has nothing to do with you. But it will relieve my stress, therefore helping me be a more efficient best friend towards you. =D

✓Do math Homework, Due WEDNESDAY.

✓Study for A&P.

✓Get notes from someone on Wednesday in Biology 131

✓Re-write stupid paper.

✓Write another paper. (so gay)

✓Love my best friend.

✓Make time for John, he misses me.

✓Go to work, when scheduled.

✓Read chapters in Bio book because I missed those stupid days.

✓Clean my room. (never going to happen)

✓Ask English teacher if I can make up a quiz, if there was one. ???

✓Sleep, Eat, Use the Bathroom.

✓NPR for Psy 199. Due Next Monday.

✓Have fun over the weekend. I'm off Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. YESSSSS. 

Okay, I think thats it for now, I can't think of anything. BUT I feel tons better, now that all that is outta my mind and on paper I know I won't forget about it. =D


Sometimes in life there are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you'll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding. But theres also the chance that the person you can count on for a lifetime, the person who knows you sometimes better than you know yourself, is the same person who's been standing beside you all along. The one that been beside me is you. 






Thanks for inspiring me again. You're wonderful. 

Saturday, September 25, 2010

Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know; maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying?

Its like this: Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer? Because it feels so good when I stop.

Sometimes you just need to cry & be sad. You need to break down & be torn apart. You need to learn how to pick yourself up & put yourself back together. Sometimes, the only way to be happy is to give into sadness first. Cause without sadness, there’s no happiness; you would never learn to smile. Do you know how depressing a life without smiling would be? 

Its like this: How would you know how it felt to lose your cell phone, if you never had one?

"It was right then that I started thinking about Thomas Jefferson on the Declaration of Independence and the part about our right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
 And I remember thinking how did he know to put the pursuit part in there?
 That maybe happiness is something that we can only pursue and maybe we can
actually never have it. No matter what. How did he know that? "
-Pursuit of Happyness

Sunday, September 12, 2010

Sunday, September 5, 2010

God woke up with me this morning.

I have a person in my life who is wise, well-spoken, and stubborn. This person is someone that I look up too. The older he gets, the smarter I get. I have been in this persons life every day of my own life, and he has taken care of me, even when I didn't know how to sit up on my own. From day one, I have been disciplined, taught, and loved unconditionally. He has been there when he needed to be there, and he knew when he needed to not be there for me, for my sake. I still do not understand how he thinks to this day, even though everyone tells me I'm just like him. If I could be half of the man he is when I'm grown, that'll be enough. I had said in an earlier post that I wanted to write about him, but I was too emotional at the time to do so. Now I think God has opened my heart enough to write about him, write about the troubles, write about the trials and situations that this man has put me in. I wanted to write about the good times, and the bad times. I wanted to tell the world, and tell him that he has molded me and disciplined me into a girl that I'm proud of.

Since I've had this blog, I've had insight on how to open up, share what I'm thinking, and many more opportunities to write. I believe with all my heart that everything happens for a reason, and when God hands you the key to open a door, you take the key and you open the door. No questions asked. So I'm writing what I'm about to type down, so that I can have it, forevermore.

This man, that I have been talking about, is of course my dad. He's a truck driver, and he went to Salt Lake City, Utah this past week. I usually get a phone call from him every once and a while. This week I didn't. I wondered why, and I was soon to find out. I never thought my dad would be a "soft, heartfelt type person" but in his older age, he's becoming softer. It's nice. Onto the point, when he arrived back home from the trip he told my mom and I a story. A story that will probably stick with me forever. For one, I never thought I would hear something like this come out of his mouth, and two my dad isn't very open about his faith. He started to tell the story.

"Utah is in a valley, and you can see as far as to the horizon, where the sky meets the earth. And in the morning, when the earth is still black, and the sky is just barely lightning up, I looked at that horizon line and saw God waking up with me that morning. Its like when a person is barely awake, and you don't want to open your eyes just yet, that represents the sky when its that pale blue color, right before the sun comes up. And then that glorious moment, when the sun just peaks over that horizon line its like God saying, Good Morning, I'm here. And we try to block out that light, and try and dodge the sun by covering our eyes. Everyone tries to make their way around the things they go through in life, without actually facing the sun, and moving forward. But that morning when God woke up with me, I figured out that I had been dodging God, and blocking out the sun wasn't going to work anymore. That morning, God woke up with me and made my day."  

My father said that, and it made my days, forever.
It's like, every bad memory, everything that happened in the past, disappeared.
I love my father, on earth and in Heaven.

My Prayer for today, God, wake up with me every morning, wake up with my dad and wrap your arms around him. Open his heart even more and I pray that someday, the solutions to every problem in my family will be found. You've done wonders with my dad, and I know that You are all-knowing, God. I wish to further Your kingdom, and be everything You want me to be. Love, Your daughter.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Secret Number One: Truthfully, you're the only thing that's ever really made me feel beautiful.

I love this. My dad is a strong believer in this saying. Ive heard it all my life. It almost inspires me to write about him, but that would bring tears to my eyes, happy and devastating tears both. Maybe I'll feel like it another night, when I'm not so emotional. I want to think I'm going crazy because of my moods and how they swing. But who defines crazy anyways? Not me.

On to another topic thats racing through my mind.
John. I like that with you, it gets better every day you make me smile like an idiot; and forget what I was saying, you make me crazy but I don't really mind; you bring out the best in me; I'm so happy I found you. I live my life knowing that your going to be by my side. Do you how much comfort that brings me when I lay my head down to go to sleep? I know some people search the world to find something like what we have, and I know people will try and try to divide something real, so until the end of time, I’m telling you that there isn’t anyone who can get in the way of what I feel for you.

My English Teacher.
She made me tear up in class. Her story about herself, hit home. I'm not stupid, and no one can tell me I'm not good enough. I'm excited about going to class tomorrow, just to see her. I already love that woman.

This is my prayer for today. Where there once was disagreement, unity can prevail. I want to live life to the fullest, Lord, and I know that will happen only as I experience Your love. Give me Your love, even for the unlovely. Thank you for your son, Jesus, who died---just for me, and for this world. Your love knows no boundaries.

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Saturday, August 21, 2010

No matter what your relationship status is, everyone has 
someone in the world they'd marry tomorrow if asked by them today.

Sometimes, there are things in our life that aren't meant to stay. Sometimes, change may not be what we want. Sometimes, change is exactly what we need. And sometimes, saying goodbye is the hardest thing you think you'll never have to do, but sometimes, saying hello again is the thing that breaks you down and makes you more vulnerable than you ever though possible. Sometimes, change is too much to bear. But most of the time, change is the only thing saving your life.

Can you tell me that ten years from today, you will remember
the days we spent catching butterflies and counting airplanes?

3rd posting of the night, I've become addicted.

This blog makes me feel better. I can vent.

I never thought I would need to vent, I'm to prideful.

On a brighter note, this is funnnyyy.
I never really got the experience of saying "goodbye" to anyone that I really loved when I went to college as a freshman last year. I never really even got the full experience, and I know that I probably should have felt some sadness when I moved into my dorm last year, but I didn't. I was moving in with someone that I knew from my high school, all my best friends moved with me, and I got to see my boyfriend on the weekends and two days a week. So my attachment from everyone was still attached.

Over the summer, I have gotten to know more a lot more people, and made new friends, and they are all moving away for college, and I'm staying in Glasgow, My hometown. I want the college experience I never went through. I want to move away, but then again, I wanna just stay where I'm at with my boyfriend and grow up together. I wanna be able to finish my Associates Degree, get an apartment and get engaged. But I don't know if I wanna do that in Glasgow? Maybe? Maybe not? I just have this feeling of hey, I'm growing up more and more as each week, month and year passes. Maybe I wont leave, maybe it wasn't meant for me to leave, but the fun times, I feel like they are gone now, and its time to get down to the nitty gritty and move on with my life. After everyone has left, what else is there to do besides grow in my relationship with my boyfriend, go to work, and go to school? Is this what the real world feels like?

I simply know that it is somewhat what it feels like. I don't live on my own, and when I start paying bills, and start having a life outside of my parents; thats when I'll be living. Thats when I'll be scared, and when I'll need all my friends that are gone with me, but they aren't going to be there. They too will move on and grow up and move out into the real world.

I don't believe that when you move to college, then thats the real world, I think its when you get out of college and don't know what direction to go. At what point do you stop and say, I'm satisfied?

I want that point to come soon for me, but I' know it won't. I know it will be a while and its kind of sad. Sad in a way that maybe something good will happen to me along the way, and then there's a chance of something changing. I don't like change. But its apart of life, at one point, I'm going to have to accept that.

I'm up at 12:49am with a headache, thinkin about this. WHY?

Thursday, August 19, 2010

RIP Michael Ray

If die young bury me in satin, lay me down on a bed of roses, sink me in the river at dawn, send me away with the words of a love song.

Lord make me a rainbow, I’ll shine down on my mother, She'll know I’m safe with you when she stands under my colors, Life ain't always what you think it ought to be, ain't even gray, but she buries her baby.

The sharp knife of a short life, well I’ve had just enough time.

 && I’ll be wearing white when I come into Your kingdom, I’m as green as the ring on my little cold finger
I’ve never known the lovin' of a man, but it sure felt nice when he was holding my hand. There’s a boy here in town says he’ll love me forever, who would have thought forever could be severed by the sharp knife of a short life, well I’ve had just enough time...

So put on your best boys and I’ll wear my pearls, what I never did is done.

A penny for my thoughts, oh no I’ll sell them for a dollar;
They're worth so much more after I’m a goner;
And maybe then you’ll hear the words I been singin’
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin’

The ballad of a dove, go with peace and love;
Gather up your tears, keep ‘em in your pocket
Save them for a time when your really gonna need 'em.

So put on your best boys and I’ll wear my pearls....

Sunday, August 15, 2010

Thursday, August 5, 2010

1:25am What have I become?

I'm thinking about, pondering on, and wondering my mind about my, and the Almighty God of this universe. This song is laying on my heart at the moment.

The Story: I came into work, and was kinda of freaked out because it had stormed and the entire city was blacked out. No red lights, no street lights, more wrecks, it was just me and my headlights; which aren't very bright anyway. Earlier that day, it was the hottest day of the year. The heat index was 108 degrees, and the steam was rising off the roads where it had rained. It looked like something out of a scary movie. My cell phone lost service. It said I could only make emergency calls. I got to work, and stayed a while. And might I mention, I'm on the graveyard shift. Anyways, the electricity finally came back on, and ruined one of the computers, this night was not turning out good. I get on my laptop, and this song pops up on Itunes. I have NO idea how it started playing on its own. But I think it was Gods way of saying, you are going to be fine. I've got your back.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Second Posting.

Live Your Life.

Too often, we go through life on autopilot going through the motions and having each day pass like the one before it. That's fine, and comfortable, until you have gone through another year without having done anything, without having really lived life. If you want to truly live life, to really experience it, to enjoy it to the fullest, instead of barely scraping by and only living a life of existence, then you need to find ways to break free from the mold. Love. Perhaps the most important thing in life. Fall in love, if you aren't already. If you have, fall in love with your boy all over again. Abandon caution and let your heart be broken. Love family members, friends, anyone. It doesn't have to be romantic love. Love all of humanity, one person at a time. Take chances. We often live our lives too cautiously, worried about what might go wrong. Be bold, risk it all. Go up to that guy you've liked for a long time and ask him out. Quit your job and start your own business. What have you got to lose? Laugh until you cry. Laughing is one of the best ways to live. Tell jokes and laugh your ass off. Watch an awesome comedy. Learn to laugh at anything. Roll on the ground laughing. You'll love it.


Inked I am.

It's beautiful, and it makes me feel beautiful.

Sunday, August 1, 2010

And when the universe has finished exploding, all the stars will slow down, like a ball that has been thrown into the air, and they will come to a halt, and they will all begin to fall toward the center of the universe again. And then there will be nothing to stop us from seeing all the stars in the world because they will all be moving toward us, gradually faster and faster, and we will know that the world is going to end soon because when we look up into the sky at night there will be no darkness, just the blazing light of billions and billions of stars, all falling.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

I started this blog because I was feeling inspired, unfortunately I'm no longer inspired because it comes in spurts.

Yours Truly,